Yankee stoicism, remote homes and a lack of community resources force many seniors to care for themselves, despite diminished abilities.
By Rachel Hellman for Seven Days, published on November 20, 2024.
As Jim’s eyesight declined, so did his quality of life. The 84-year-old had long lived alone at the end of a dirt road in Weston, a small town in the southern Green Mountains. He spent his adult life skiing and picking up odd jobs, living mostly off-grid. He never married or had kids.
When he stopped driving two years ago, he had fewer opportunities to see people. He depended on a neighbor to give him a weekly ride to buy groceries. He struggled to prepare food for himself.
“I was a total handyman,” said Jim, a tall, gruff man who asked Seven Days not to share his last name. “But after a while, I couldn’t even change my own light bulb.”
His rural home overflowed with items, mostly junk that he’d collected over the years, which caused him to frequently lose his glasses and cellphone. His porch bulged with broken tables, discarded clothing and old tools. His washing machine no longer worked, so he couldn’t launder his clothing and sheets. Rats wandered freely inside his home.
Jim’s estate lawyer, who checked in on him regularly, raised concern last spring with Regina Downer, a community nurse responsible for six mountain towns in Windsor County. Downer, a health care worker and advocate, started visiting Jim in an effort to gain his trust. He was resistant to the help, though.
“I was living in a rather rough spot,” he acknowledged later. “But that did not bother me at all.”
Downer persisted. She was unwilling to enter Jim’s home because it was so difficult to navigate, so they talked in her car or at a local diner where she took him for breakfast.
Downer helped Jim get cataract surgery to improve his eyesight and to fill out an advance directive; the diner’s owner signed off as a witness. But the nurse worried about how Jim would fare in the winter. He would be dependent on his neighbor to plow him out. Further, Jim heated his home with wood. The previous winter, a chimney fire burned a hole in his roof that had yet to be fixed.
“He was going to be alone, and I was going to worry about him,” Downer said. “I was afraid his whole house would [catch] fire.”
It’s common for seniors who live alone to reach a point where they can no longer adequately care for themselves. In fact, the phenomenon is so prevalent that those working in the eldercare field have a term for it: self-neglect. It leads to more calls to adult protective services agencies nationwide than any form of elder abuse.
Read the full article on the Seven Days website.
Hear Rachel speak about this story on WCAX, November 20, 2024: Isolated older Vermonters can struggle alone.